Last week I had to go for a mammogram...otherwise known as a "boob squish"!! Oh the joy! Us women have it good when it comes to body parts, don't we??? I think in the next life there will be justice..I am counting on it!
After returning home from Kileen, I was having extreme tooth pain in the back molar area. Oh geez! I am still having such fun! So early in the morning they "squeezed" (little pun for above goodness) me in. Dentist fishes around and numbs and prods and pulls and pokes then says "you need a root canal" Oh is this fun EVER gonna end??? NO!!!
Same day: Another bilateral mammo and ulatrasound! So, prodding in the mouth and squishing and pulling and cold gel down there on those things...
The only word that kept coming to my mind was ....violated! Yes, I had been violated! An attitude check would say that is is all for a good cause! Need to keep those teeth and....those things....healthy!
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
I see London, I see France....
Not really...BUT... I did see someones underpants...
And here is how the story goes.....
We have a good friend ( who is really Leon's good friend, adopted by me) whose name is Mark. He is a helicopter pilot and has degenerative disks in his back from flying for 32 years. Because of the pain, he requires an epidural shot to his back every 6 months. Before the shot, they give him Valium and because of that he is not allowed to drive home. Now the stage is set....
He called me and told me that his wife was going to be out of town and asked if I would I be willing to take him to the doctor. Of course, I would. Act of service. Friends help friends. He would do the same for me. You get the picture.
Mark arrived at my house and he drove us TO the doctors office. In the waiting room, he informs me that I have to go into the room with him...............uh, excuse me????
The conversation went something like this
Mark: You have to go with me into the room.
Me: Uh, why?
Mark: In case I faint
Me: What if I faint?
Mark: You won't
So I think by now you get a little idea about where this story is going. We get escorted back to the "room". A male nurse ( murse, as we loving refer to them) comes in and THAT conversation went like this:
Nurse: Can I ask the relationship here? I ask because Mark has to undress
Mark: Looks at me
Me: Look at Mark with bugged out eyes
Mark: Uh......
Me: Pals, we are pals
Mark: She can turn her head
Me: MORTIFIED
The guys face was priceless. I think he felt so awkward but let me assure you that he wasn't the only one feeling that way.
The "murse" hands Mark his little paper gown and out the door he goes.
I promptly turn my head and cover my face with my book (thank you John Bytheway). I hear crinkling and tugging and rustling and then Mark announces that he is done. He jumps up on the table and I guess now I am supposed to have a normal conversation with him while he lounges in his "gown". Oh boy.
They finally come and get him and take him to another room to administer the shot. I think hard about running out of the room before he returns. But I am too late. As quickly as they had taken him, they returned him!
Same scenario only in the reverse. Paper rattles, wrinkles and crinkles and finally he is clothed.
As we walk to the car I gently tell him that I think our relationship has risen to a whole new level...and that he owes me BIG!!!!!
As my Mom said, "who but you, Jenn, who but you?" I agree.
And here is how the story goes.....
We have a good friend ( who is really Leon's good friend, adopted by me) whose name is Mark. He is a helicopter pilot and has degenerative disks in his back from flying for 32 years. Because of the pain, he requires an epidural shot to his back every 6 months. Before the shot, they give him Valium and because of that he is not allowed to drive home. Now the stage is set....
He called me and told me that his wife was going to be out of town and asked if I would I be willing to take him to the doctor. Of course, I would. Act of service. Friends help friends. He would do the same for me. You get the picture.
Mark arrived at my house and he drove us TO the doctors office. In the waiting room, he informs me that I have to go into the room with him...............uh, excuse me????
The conversation went something like this
Mark: You have to go with me into the room.
Me: Uh, why?
Mark: In case I faint
Me: What if I faint?
Mark: You won't
So I think by now you get a little idea about where this story is going. We get escorted back to the "room". A male nurse ( murse, as we loving refer to them) comes in and THAT conversation went like this:
Nurse: Can I ask the relationship here? I ask because Mark has to undress
Mark: Looks at me
Me: Look at Mark with bugged out eyes
Mark: Uh......
Me: Pals, we are pals
Mark: She can turn her head
Me: MORTIFIED
The guys face was priceless. I think he felt so awkward but let me assure you that he wasn't the only one feeling that way.
The "murse" hands Mark his little paper gown and out the door he goes.
I promptly turn my head and cover my face with my book (thank you John Bytheway). I hear crinkling and tugging and rustling and then Mark announces that he is done. He jumps up on the table and I guess now I am supposed to have a normal conversation with him while he lounges in his "gown". Oh boy.
They finally come and get him and take him to another room to administer the shot. I think hard about running out of the room before he returns. But I am too late. As quickly as they had taken him, they returned him!
Same scenario only in the reverse. Paper rattles, wrinkles and crinkles and finally he is clothed.
As we walk to the car I gently tell him that I think our relationship has risen to a whole new level...and that he owes me BIG!!!!!
As my Mom said, "who but you, Jenn, who but you?" I agree.
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